raw thoughts at 8:34 pm

Funny how everyone wants to be perfect in this society.  Perfect hair, perfect grades, pefectnessthatalljustrunstogetherandwecan’tstopit

andit’sjustanavalancheofbeauty.

I have been branded as perfect.

And I don’t want it.

It comes with eye rolls and assumptions and snide remarks andIswearIdon’tandevenwhenIsayI’mnot

youlaughandsaythatmakesmeevenmoreperfect.

I have been marked.

Someone, please, take that branding back.  Let me have flaws.

machete anne with an e

Hello.  Yah, I know long time (coughcough try six months!)

Okk, well, life just got super crazy theses last six months: End of freshman year, Nationals for History Day, summer 2011, then the start of sophomore year, which has been hands down the toughest year of my life.  For anyone who has ever taken AP World, I love you and I know how you feel.

Anyways, this totally isn’t gonna turn into a rant post.  This is a dedication post to my bestie slash sister slash rant partner, Michaela “Machete/Mckay/Mic/the best bestie ever” anne (with an e).  This term, we have two classes together.  This morning, our school’s music dept took our annual trip to San Francisco.  Although it was nothing like last year(; it was still amazing.  Michaela and I worked on homework both ways, almost non-stop.  We got each other going and gave each other the energy to keep going (they’re clapping for us!  Whoooo, go us!).  I realized just how much I love this girl.  We’ve been best friends since seventh grade, and we’ve been through good times (science 8th grade year) and bad times (the blazing inferno that is sophomore year), and we’ve stayed best friends through all of it.  We give each other the energy to keep going and not kill ourselves and others (I could kill you with this!), even when we have countless back-to-back nights of going to bed at 10, waking up at 6 (or earlier), a full day of school, working out, homework, then doing it all over again.  I honestly don’t know if I could do it without this girl.  I definitely wouldn’t be as happy as I am, because I’d let the stress consume me.  I might not be able to push myself to take all the Honors/ AP classes that I do take because there wouldn’t be anyone to share the stories and frustrations with.  I wouldn’t have anyone to talk to when I’m about to lose it.   Machete Anne, you rock!  I love you!  This has definitely been the hardest year of my life and you have no idea how thankful I am for you.  To solidify this, I dedicate this song, one of my favorites, to you: Keep Holding On.

To the past, thank you so so so much!  To the future, filled with even more AP classes, stress, inside jokes, and (gasp!) college apps, well, grab your stuff — something is about to go down(:

Marshmallows

So I sit here, shivering and exhausted but completely happy because I have THE most awesome nighborhood in the world.  When the weather is nice, we all just sit outside and talk or whatever.  And yah, sometimes the police come and say there was a complaint about the noise, but it’s okay because we all have so much fun.  This summer, we’re going to do campouts and marshmallows and stuff.  So yah, I’m pretty blissed out right now(:  I’ll blog some more tomorrow but for now I’m just exhausted.  Adios, mis amigos!

Rome & Juliet, a story of star-crossed sexual innuendos . . .

Woww!  It’s been almost a month since my last real post!  I need to get better at this . . .

Well, a lot has happened since my last (real) post.  For example, I got my first D on a test.  It was horrendous.  I cried.  I have also been testing for the STAR Exam (and, yes, I am infected).  I sent in my paper (which took me a good five minutes to convince myself to hit the “Send” button.  Yes, I am ridonculous). 

I have started working in my church’s Special Needs Ministry.  It’s tough and sometimes I feel as though I don’t know what to do, but I wouldn’t have it any other way.  It’s a beautiful burden to be blessed with!!  I am also blessed to be working with such Godly, beautiful children.  They are teaching me SO much about patience, love, and acceptance. 

We also started Romeo and Juliet in Honors English.   And . . . ohh boy.  Okk.  Now, I realize this is regarded as a master literary work by a genius, a beautiful love story of star crossed lovers, a tale that will never die . . . BUT THAT’S NOT TRUE!!!  Shakespeare did NOT write this with high schoolers in mind!  Our teacher “casts” each scene and has a specific person speak each part.  Gender is often botched, but we just kinda roll with it.  What’s more important is that this is a VERY INAPROPRIATE story!  Men were talking about being “civil” with maids and then chopping their heads off (No joke!  I’m sorry, but that is NOT my idea of being civil!  Gosh darn these people!!), thrusting women up against walls (Uhm . . . yah.  Just gonna leave that one where it lays . . . the teen boys took care of that one), and talking about nursing babies.  The nurse (a.k.a., that one weird aunt everyone has that always gives WAYY too much information) was talking about “laying wormwood to her dug” (applying wormwood to her breast to ween her baby), and we were all cracking up, and one of the guys was all, “COme on guys!  It’s just a nipple!”  Hahahahaha.  Ohh boy.  Also, they use the word “ho” alot, which, in the 1500s, meant “now” or “hurry.”  Well, I’m sure you can imagine how well that went over.  Shakespeare, you’re killin’ us!

And to think we’ve only just begun . . .

Man your stations! It’s STAR Fever!!

To The Public:

We appreciate your supreme cooperation in handling the last infectious outbreak, Midterm Fever.  However,  it has been brought to our attention that a new strain of infection has affected our local schools. 

It’s infectious.  It’s deadly.  It’s contagious.  It’s . . .

STAR FEVER!

Unlike Midterm Fever, STAR Fever is affecting all our schools, not just our high schools.  However, our high schools seem to be affected the most.

The following symptoms of STAR Fever are:

• Acute reactions to the following phrases: review, testing schedule, writing exam, #2 pencil, test booklet, and answer document
• The unfavorable desire to live in sweatshirts and sweatpants
• Bubble vision (the act or state of seeing bubbles in your head)
• Sore back and bottom from prolonged periods of sitting
• Hands cramped in the position of pencil-holding
• Extreme aversion to the letter sets ABCD and FGHJ along with an overwhelming desire to choose C
• Desire to curse all teachers, past and present, in any and all subjects, for not preparing you academically for this challenge

If you are exhibiting these symptoms, please refrain from interacting with those around you. 

We look forward to your cooperation in overcoming this crisis.

Thank you.

Green Tea and bibles(:

Woww, it’s been a whole week since I posted!  I definitely need to get better at this blogging thing!

This weekend has been nice and relaxing.  I always love these two days I can have to myself and be free to read my Bible, watch TV with my siblings, and just do whatever.  I never like going back to school on Monday (who does?) but I know that with each Monday we come that much closer to summer. 

Starting on Saturday, I’ve had a very spiritual weekend.  My very dear friend from church, Becca, is a freshman in college and premedical school.  We work together in the twos classroom at our church.  On Thursday, she got back from serving on a two-month mission trip in Malawi.  We talked about her trip a lot and she reminisced how eye-opening it was.  I know anyone and everyone who met her in Africa is better because of it!  She’s a true testament to the Christian faith and has such a clean pure heart.  We caught up and I filled her in on everything that happened in twos since she’d been away.  Service in twos was awesome; it’s so cool to see Jesus through these little ones.  It’s so evident He’s working through them when they’re sharing with each other and engaging in worship and the Bible story.  At the end of the service, she thanked me for helping out, as she does every week; as I was heading out the door, she says, “I kept wishing you were there with me in Malawi when I was teaching Sunday School with the street boys.  They’d act up and I’d think, woww, I could use some Sierra help right about now!”  It made me so happy, especially coming from her.  It’s so cool to think that even though I live for Jesus first, I’m touching other people, too.  It made me smile(:

After that, I had a couple minutes of quiet time with my green tea listening to worship music in the lobby.  I met with the coordinator for my church’s Special Needs ministry; I’m going to start working in the Special Needs Ministry starting in April.  I’ll be trained and paired with a little buddy and I’ll accompany him/her to the appropriate classroom if they’re feeling up to it, or if they’re not, I’d read to them and play and just . . . be there for them.  This is something I’ve been praying about for a long time.  I’ve been praying for guidance to make the right decision and it’s so cool God is sending me to work with these beautiful people. 

After I met with the coordinator, I went to the Pre-K/K classroom to serve there as well.  They’re such cool kids, every one of them.  This is the fourth year I’ve served in Kidsfest, and I’ve seen so many children pass through out system.  Some good, some bad, some quiet, loud, thin, round, White, Black, Asian, Indian, “typical,” special needs, boys and girls . . . ALL BEAUTIFUL.  Thank you, God, for placing me with these gorgeous people and an awesome church family!  I wanna do this forever.  As I sit here typing and listening to Worship music, I know this is what I’ve been placed here to do.  Hopefully I’ll be able to use these skills along with medicine someday.  Until then, though, I’m pretty darn content.

Creepy waiters(:

My ohh my.

Can you say “whirlwind weekend”?

I sure can.

Well, to start off, Midterms were on Thursday and Friday.  Normally, I’d just bum around all weekend and catch up on sleep and sanity.  Instead, we had Capitol Region History Day 2011 (ohh yes, fancy!  Because, of course, Sac County HD isn’t good enough).  This year, they decided to split the normally one day competition into TWO days — yes, they unnecessarily stretched this thing over my entire weekend.  Saturday was registration and judging and Sunday (today) was the Awards Ceremony.  Yesterday, Michaela and I, mothers in tow, went to lunch at Mesquite, which was AMAZING — well, except for that one waiter who kept looking at me . . . yah, that was weird.  After that, we headed out to the competition for interview.  The interview was quick, easy, and painless.  That was something I definitely wasn’t expecting, because my luck with interviews hasn’t gone so well in the past — some interviews I’ve even left in tears.  Anyway, after interview, we went home for some much-needed chilling time. 

Sunday — or, rather, today — we left once again (at 8:30!!  Too early!) for the competition to hear who placed to represent the Capitol Region in San Jose for the NHD-CA State Finals.  My best friend Michaela and I had been prepping ourselves to not place, only because we were up against seniors this year — I mean, they’re ADULTS!!  Gahh!  The Big Guy in the Sky was looking out for me, though, because I placed!  Michaela wasn’t able to place, which is a bummer (woww!  I’ve been using that word a lot lately!), but we’ll be able to go to State next year. 

Well, Capitol Region History Day has definitely taken what little sanity I had left after Midterms — I’m going to be living in my Steelers sweatshirt and with my hair in a bun for a while.  I’m not the only one affected, either — some have been reported wearing interesting choices of footwear as a result of HD.  Ohh, well.